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"You wanted to talk…?"

"I always want to talk."

"…I know. Well… what is it?"

"It’s just… every time you say something like that…"

"Like what?"

"…that you miss me. You have control of this… I know, I know, you don’t even have to say it, I know how much you’re working…"

"…I’m sorry."

Adam lets out another short sigh as he shakes his forehead against his left hand. "What do you want me to say?" Shar says quietly. Adam lets the car fill with silence for a moment before continuing.

"I can’t play this game anymore."

"Which…"

"Pretending that when you say you have a busy week it means that you don’t have a single free moment. Obviously I’m willing to drive all the way out here. You literally have dozens of opportunities to see me that you don’t take, and I’m always willing to finesse my schedule so I can see you…"

"…what are you saying?"

"You couldn’t possibly miss me that much. If you did, you’d at least make an effort to get in touch with me more often than every two weeks."

"…I do miss you. And I think about you all the time. Sometimes, at work, you’re all I think about…"

"Like what?"

"Just, you know… good memories. The way you helped with the kittens, our trip to San Diego… the first night in my new apartment… the flowers on Valentine’s Day…"

Adam returns his eyes to the steering wheel, his fingers resting gently at the bottom of the curve.

"Adam, what?"

"…nothing."

"What is it?"

"I don’t see the point. Every time I talk about it you get upset…"

She scoffs in resignation, dropping her head back into the seat.

"…see, every time…"

"I don’t understand what you want me to say."

"The truth."

Adam glares at her, causing her to finally turn her head towards him silently. Once he’s got her attention, he continues.

"You see him, right?"

"What do you mean?"

"John. It’s got to be at least, what, twice a week?"

"Sometimes."

"And I have to drive out to Willow Grove at two o’clock in the morning to spend a half hour break with you. You’re telling me that you miss me. I guess you don’t spend long enough away from him that you can miss him…"

"What do you want me to do? Sometimes he just comes over…"

"…because you gave him the key. That’s a permanent invitation. And you can’t deny that you want him there some of the time."

"Well what else do I have to compare it to? This? He’s more like a friend at this point anyway, and when I spend time with him I can just relax instead of having to worry about talking about stuff like this…"

Adam shoots an icy glare in her direction before looking out the driver’s side window.

"…what?"

"…nothing."

"Adam…"

"…why is it like this, Shar?"

He turns over to look back at her.

"Why do we have to talk about this? Was I the one who wanted to separate? Was I the one who then wanted to try dating other people… after two years together? I wanted to try working things out. I wanted to see a therapist, but you wouldn’t have it. You needed space…"

"Adam, it’s like this happens every time we talk… if we could have just one conversation where we didn’t have to do with this…"

"It’s self defeating, Shar. The more time we spend apart, the harder it gets for me to think about anything else, so when we see each other once every two weeks, what do you think I want to use the face time for? If we saw each other and talked more, we could have these conversations civilly, and it would be water under the bridge. Instead, I have a half hour to talk to you, we have a conversation like this, and you don’t want to see me for two weeks until you forget about it. We only ever do it your way. We’ve only ever done it that way."

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