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"I still want to know," I said, wiping the saliva off as unobtrusively as I could, suppressing a curse as I felt my make-up smear. "I’ve always wanted to meet one of you and ask questions."

"Ask away," he said cheerfully. "But, first, we ought to go and sit down somewhere in the woods. It doesn’t really matter to me, but you look as if you’re going to pass out."

He steered me away from the village and up a low hill to a little wood. Here, the ground was carpeted by thick layers of pine needles and we could sit in relative comfort. The moon was brighter than ever. I began to hate the moon.

"So," he said, "what did you want to ask?"

"Uh...how did you become a werewolf?"

He laughed. "I answered an ad," he said. "Eternal Life Enterprises. They guarantee you’ll live forever, so long as you follow instructions, but you mustn’t divulge their methods. Those are a trade secret."

"And you like it? Aren’t there...complications in your lifestyle?"

"Oh yes," he said and laughed. "You can’t believe the embarrassment one has in trying to invent excuses for having oneself vaccinated against parvovirus and distemper. After all those don’t infect humans, unlike rabies."

"Parvovirus and distemper?"

"Sure," he said. "A werewolf is a member of the dog family, so he – or she – is liable to any of the diseases dogs get. We’re supposed to get ourselves licensed too, but most of us don’t go that far."

"You don’t?" My head was spinning.

"And there’s the problem of clothing," he said. "You know how Superman used to change in phone booths until phone booths ceased to exist? We have kind of the same problem: we have to find some place to leave our clothes until we change and pick them up afterwards. Mind you, I believe that there are nudist colonies of werewolves, who don’t have that particular problem. But I was never comfortable as a pack hunter, even though I’m a Pack member."

"I thought wolves were." I looked around for a chance to escape and found none. "Pack hunters, I mean."

"Wolves were, perhaps, but not werewolves." He laughed immoderately at his stupid joke. "As I was saying, there are downsides. But of course the advantages are great, as you demonstrated just now."

"You ever got caught...changing?"

He was watching me keenly as he answered. "Not even nearly...but there was the time when there was a partial lunar eclipse, you know, on the full moon night. It was kind of troublesome being a werewolf on the left half of my body and a human on the right. I couldn’t get a damned thing done."

"Unhff," I said. I had begun to feel very strange. I put it down to fear and nervous tension, and took a deep breath to relax. It immediately made me feel much worse because it was full of his odour. "How about...hunting?" I asked. My words seemed to slur and bind in my mouth. "Difficult, no? Danger...ous?"

"Dangerous? Why? We don’t have to hunt unless we want to. Most months I satiate my need for meat from the local butcher. I’m his best customer. It’s just that I’m on vacation now, and I felt a bit like hunting. I mean," he said, his eyes gleaming at me, "you spend a life as an accounts clerk, someone who everyone thinks is the most boring thing on earth, and see if you don’t feel like creating some mayhem if you get the chance."

"Grrfff," I growled, trying to swish my tail. My tight leather pants were in the way, so I clawed them to shreds. My mouth felt all wrong, full of teeth. Then I opened it and howled, and it felt right. "What’s happening?" I asked, dropping to all fours and panting.

"You must’ve had some cut or abrasion on your skin," he said. "My saliva...anyway, it can’t be helped. It’s too late now to be undone.

"You’re feeling ill, aren’t you? You’ll feel better soon, don’t worry. The first time’s always the worst. Just remember, don’t merely bite people you don’t like – that’s going to convert them. Eat them instead."

"Eat them," I agreed, feeling my canines grow.

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