Page 2

Ben began to dream of fire. In his dreams there was fire all around, exploding in front of him, raining down from above. He chalked it up to stress and worry. He told Tom about his dreams on day.

"I recall a class I took in college, which is something since I didn't do much going to class," he said. "A man can get something under his skin, only he don't quite realize what it is. But it comes out in the dreams. Sometimes a man can get a notion that he don't quite believe but which gets stuck in his head regardless."

"I don't know if I'm going to blow up or what," Ben said.

"Just keep thinking good thoughts," Tom counseled. "Hope for the best, have faith is all. You'll see."

One night Karen took to drifting in and out of awareness. "I hurt," was all she could mumble. Barbara took Karen in the car and drove madly to the slaughterhouse where Ben was working the night shift. She smashed the side of the car against a tree along the way, she drove so fast.

In the waiting room Ben dreamt of blood. In his dream he was sprayed with blood, fresh and wet that came spurting from out of the darkness, from out of the wood that was nailed together all around him. He fell repeatedly into craters of thick, congealed blood, choking on it, drowning.The doctor woke him. "There's only one thing I can think of," he said.

"What is that," Ben said.

The doctor shifted in the chair, which creaked loudly.

"Has Karen been exposed to any sort of radiation?" he said.

"No, man," Ben said. "You mean like a bomb?" He almost laughed.

"Well, we'll run some more tests, but if you can think of anything, let me know." The doctor looked around, over his shoulder. "For now, keep that under your hat. Wouldn't want to upset the wife, you know. Sometimes, we can get an idea in our heads and let it make off with us. You understand."

Ben didn't tell Barbara. They sat the next day over cold breakfast.

"Maybe we should pray," Barbara.

"Prayin's for church," Ben said. He held his head in his hands. He hadn't had a decent night's sleep in weeks.

"Well, then," Barbara said.

Ben began dreaming of white, hard-eyed people chasing him, always moving toward him with their arms outstretched as if to hug him. In these dreams he was aware that he was dreaming, but couldn't wake himself up, so just ran and ran. They were everywhere, around every corner and behind every tree, mouthing incoherent words. All he could hear was the sound of their raspy breath like the wind blowing away piles of dead leaves.

Barbara picked a church out of the phone book that Sunday and, after talking Judy into watching Karen, dressed up and got in Ben's pickup. Halfway across town, they were stopped by lines and lines of people dressed in crooked crosses and white shrouds, screaming. They surrounded the truck.

"Nigger nigger nigger lover! Goddamn you to hell!" they yelled. They smashed the windows with rocks and dragged Ben outside, across the street and down on his knees before a short piggish bald man holding a shotgun.

"Think you're so smart," the man said. "now you tell me."

Ben could hear Barbara screaming and police sirens wailing. He curled into a ball.

"Stay down there, for all the good it'll do you," he heard one of them say.

Gradually the kicking subsided. He hurt everywhere. His muscles spasmed in pain when policemen hauled him up and into their car. Before he knew what was happening, he was in handcuffs.

"Hey man," he mumbled, blood pouring from his lips. The policeman smacked his face. Ben spit at him.

"Boy, the next time you do something like that, I'm gonna drag you out and feed you to those people," the cop said as he pulled out his nightstick and began smashing.

He dreamed through a pounding ache, in and around a pain that severed him. Fire and blood all around. Hands grabbing him, tearing, beating. The bruises covering him turned to raw leaking holes. He felt himself turning cold, then hot again. There was a sharp, drilling pain in his forehead.

He awoke in a holding cell. He couldn't tell what time of day it was; there were no windows. He wanted to call out for the guard but couldn't, the pain was too great. Blood was pooled in the cot next to him. There was the sound of loud television. He lay there for several minutes before seeing Barbara at the bars, holding them and staring at him.

[ Continue to page 3 ]